Why is peace so hard? she said & I said peace is easy.
Keeping our mouths shut is hard.

~ Brian Andreas

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The month of 'love' is up....

Tomorrow begins a new month and a new focus. I think this has been a good month reflecting on self-love. Loving and accepting oneself inside and out. The 'you' and the 'body'. Funny.... as I've been scrapping and organizing photos and seeing older pics of myself I started thinking, hey, maybe I wasn't all that ugly. LOL There are definitely photos that are less flattering than others. Some definitely not much attractive, but all-in-all, I think I cringe a just a little less at the bad ones and think not too shabby of the better ones.
I've been putting on makeup almost every day because it makes me look better. And when you look better, you feel better. I'm getting new glasses (precipitated by having mine knocked into and off my face with a basketball) that I think will be an improvement, too. Now, if I could just get a new wardrobe...... LOL
It was actually the death of Whitney Houston this month that made me think about putting the effort into makeup every day. She was beautiful. I'm sure she had her less than stellar moments (as a matter of fact, some were caught on camera) but any time she was made up, she was simply beautiful. I don't know, she just made me want to make the effort to look good.
Next month is a continuation of that.... but you'll have to wait until tomorrow to find out exactly what it is!

Monday, February 20, 2012

You are more....

The word this month is LOVE. And for different people, it may have another focus. Maybe it's about family, or relationships, or just general. All of which could use some of my attention. But I chose to really think about and work on self-love. Finding and focusing on the good stuff. I'm not a religious person, I'm agnostic. But I do love some of the messages. This song is based in religion, but I love the main message. YOU ARE MORE.
You Are More - Tenth Avenue North

There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling rain & remember it is enough to be taken care of by myself. (Brian Andreas)

Sunday, February 19, 2012


apparently I don't have as much to say as I thought I did. LOL I need feedback, people! Who's reading this? LOL

Today I went through pics (a LOT - and that was in FILM days) of a Disney trip to scrap and narrowed it down. There is just way too many pics! I'm hoping to crop several enough without cropping too much out to squeeze several onto a page. Six layouts max is what I'm allowing in the scrapbooks. LOL

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Random thought.....

If monkeys (chimps, apes - whichever) are so like humans.... do they also have self-esteem issues?

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Greatest Love of All

That was my favorite song Whitney Houston sang from her first album. LOVED that song. I still love it. Very appropriate since this month's word is LOVE and one of the things I've been thinking on is self-esteem and loving oneself, which is what I posted about recently.

Whitney Houston was beautiful and had an amazing voice. Her death yesterday at only 48 saddens me.
Greatest Love of All

You will be missed. I Will Always Love You

Saturday, February 11, 2012

the internet... part 2

Ok, read the last post first if you haven't. This is an update. :p

So, I just found out still searching, that I could get my father's adoption info. But damn, it'd cost an arm and a leg! :( $28 fee by mail. Plus you have to provide documents which I don't have, which would cost me more money! My birth certificate is a laminated wallet card. I think I'd have to send for a certified copy. And then I would need a certified copy of my father's death certificate. :(

That is so NOT right!!! >:( They are all freaking dead for crying out loud. It's in the social security death index, so why the hell should I need a copy!

Here's where I got the info: http://www.mass.gov/eohhs/docs/dph/vital-records/pre-adoption-memo.pdf

the internet.... again

I wasn't going to stay on that long. Really. Then reading one post about genealogy on a forum I go to, and I get sucked in looking around the internet for clues. And since I don't even know who my father's parents were or his birth name, I might've wasted all that time barking up the wrong tree. Ooops... No pun was intended. LMAO.
I ended up coming across a website for the Massachusetts archives that says to contact Judicial Archives about adoption records. So I just emailed to see if it's possible to have the records opened and how to do that. My father and his parents are all dead and have been for over 10 years. I think it's ridiculous to keep info from people. Anyway, even if they will open them it'll probably end up being for some stupid price over $20.
I heard he was told his birth parents died in a train accident. One could assume that is why he was put out for adoption. Which means his birth could be in local records. I have contacted the library from the town he was born in, but it was like pulling teeth with people not getting back to you and giving you full info. I even tried like 10 years apart. I tried google searching with a name I got recently, but can't find anything about a child's birth for the couple. Which would've been not long before they died and before the 1940 census which is coming out soon. He would've already been with my grandparents by then.
The likelyhood of ever seeing pics of my father's ancestors... slim to none. That would be really cool to see what they looked like. I'd like to know where the heritage traces back to, before the United States.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Time out....

I think I need to put myself in time out from the internet. LOL I spend waaaaaay too much time online. I'm just not sure I have the willpower. Sometimes I go through moods where I don't visit some sites I normally go to, or I lurk and not post. But if I am home all day, staying offline is harder. Not that it makes me more productive. I can easily waste time doing nothing much at all. Even though I have PLENTY I could be doing. Scrapping, cardmaking, sewing (several projects there!), organizing, knitting or crocheting....

Friday, February 3, 2012

I love me!

Ok, not really. And if you don't come by it by nature or nurture, it's a bit hard to love yourself just the way you are. It's easy to find what's wrong with yourself and a lot more difficult to find the 'good stuff'. I love quotes in general, but I love quotes that are related to self-esteem because (and is this an oxymoron or something?) they are a little nudge that says you are worthy.

Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are. ~Malcolm S. Forbes

I've been looking forward to this month's word because loving myself is something that has often eluded me most of my life and something I still need to work on. Last year I came across a quote and made a layout to tell myself something I need to hear.

This was a layout I did back in 2008. One of my dear friends online sent me the quote. She said she found it and thought of me. Not all gifts come wrapped. :) *sniff sniff*

I found this great site of self esteem quotes and I'm thinking of making a mini album. We'll see. Here's a great poem I found on the site to end this post with.

Only You ~ Dan Coppersmith

No one on Earth
Exists quite like you
And no one is able
To do what you do

The person you are
The talents you bear
Gifts that only
You can share

Only you have learned
From the things you’ve done
Gaining perspective
From the battles you’ve won

Times when you’ve lost
Have been priceless too
The lessons contribute
To what makes you you

The rest of the world
Can’t see through your eyes
Which is why your insight
May be such a prize

Because you are you
There are lives you affect
Much more than you
Would ever expect

The things you do
The things you say
Send ripples throughout
The Milky Way

You’re unique, amazing
Like no one else
You have the exclusive
On being yourself.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

A new month... a new word!

And what word is more appropriate in February than LOVE? Yep! That's the word of the month to focus on.

I'm really hungry, so right now what I'd LOVE is something yummy to eat! LOL